雅思搞笑故事 03：口语Part 2让我描述一个敬佩的人，我描述成了前任
雅思口语Part 2，考官递给我一张题卡。
"Describe a person you admire. You should say: who this person is, how you know them, what they are like, and explain why you admire them."
一分钟准备时间。我盯着题卡，脑子里飞速搜索素材库。
我敬佩的人……老师？太普通了。马云？考官可能没听说过。我爷爷？他确实很厉害，但素材不够丰满，两分钟说不满。
时间只剩四十秒。我做了一个错误的决定。
"Okay, I'd like to talk about my ex-girlfriend."
考官挑了一下眉。但规则就是规则，她不能打断我。
"Who is she?"考官问。
"She was my girlfriend for three years. She is... she was... actually, grammar correction. She was my girlfriend. She used to be. Past tense."
考官在评分表上写了什么。我假装没看见。
"How do you know her?"
"We met at university. She sat behind me in the library. She borrowed my eraser. That was three years ago."
"What is she like?"
我深吸一口气。Part 2的关键点是描述要有细节，要用形容词。
"She was very punctual. She was always on time, except when she wasn't. Actually, she was late ninety percent of the time, but she always had an excuse. Once she was late for two hours because she 'stopped to watch a sunset.' That was in the morning."
考官的笔停了一下。
"Explain why you admire her."
我知道这是关键题。Part 2要拿高分，这部分必须有深度。
"I admire her because she was incredibly organised. She kept a spreadsheet of our relationship. Columns: dates, emotional investments, who paid for dinner, who was right about the last argument. Every Sunday she would send me a summary."
考官的眉毛现在不是挑了，是直接飞到了额头。
"She once told me, 'Communication is key.' And then she stopped communicating for three days without any reason. That's what I call... commitment."
考官试图控制表情。"So... you admire her communication skills?"
"I admire her ability to contradict herself without noticing. I've been studying IELTS for six months, and I still can't do that."
时间到了。考官放下题卡，问我Part 3："Do you think it's healthy to compare your current partner to an ex?"
我愣了一下。"I don't have a current partner."
"Score:"考官在纸上写下最后一个数字，"Speaking: 5.5."
我走出考场，心想：至少我的流利度是真的。毕竟，我花了整整三年练习那段感情的台词。
——雅思口语教会我最重要的一件事：Part 2两分钟，说什么都行，但千万别选前任当素材。因为你会发现，你根本不需要准备，她说过的每一句话你都记得清清楚楚。
English Version
IELTS Speaking Part 2. The examiner handed me a cue card.
"Describe a person you admire. You should say: who this person is, how you know them, what they are like, and explain why you admire them."
One minute to prepare. I stared at the card, scanning my mental material library at high speed.
Someone I admire... a teacher? Too generic. Jack Ma? The examiner might not have heard of him. My grandfather? He was impressive, sure, but not enough material to fill two minutes.
Forty seconds left. I made a terrible decision.
"Okay, I'd like to talk about my ex-girlfriend."
The examiner raised an eyebrow. But rules are rules — she couldn't interrupt.
"Who is she?" she asked.
"She was my girlfriend for three years. She is... she was... actually, grammar correction. She was my girlfriend. She used to be. Past tense."
The examiner scribbled something on the scoring sheet. I pretended not to notice.
"How do you know her?"
"We met at university. She sat behind me in the library. She borrowed my eraser. That was three years ago."
"What is she like?"
I took a deep breath. The key to Part 2 is detail and descriptive adjectives.
"She was very punctual. She was always on time, except when she wasn't. Actually, she was late ninety percent of the time, but she always had an excuse. Once she was two hours late because she 'stopped to watch a sunset.' That was in the morning."
The examiner's pen paused.
"Explain why you admire her."
I knew this was the critical question. To score high on Part 2, this part needed depth.
"I admire her because she was incredibly organised. She kept a spreadsheet of our relationship. Columns: dates, emotional investments, who paid for dinner, who was right about the last argument. Every Sunday she would send me a summary."
The examiner's eyebrows were no longer raised — they had flown straight to her hairline.
"She once told me, 'Communication is key.' And then she stopped communicating for three days without any reason. That's what I call... commitment."
The examiner tried to control her expression. "So... you admire her communication skills?"
"I admire her ability to contradict herself without noticing. I've been studying IELTS for six months, and I still can't do that."
Time was up. The examiner put down the cue card and moved to Part 3. "Do you think it's healthy to compare your current partner to an ex?"
I froze. "I don't have a current partner."
"Score:" she wrote the final number on her sheet, "Speaking: 5.5."
I walked out of the exam room thinking: at least my fluency was genuine. After all, I spent three years rehearsing that relationship's lines.
— The most important thing IELTS Speaking taught me: in Part 2, you can talk about anything, but never pick your ex as your topic. Because you'll realise you didn't need to prepare at all — you remember every word she ever said.
No comments yet.